The Bull of The Woods

Last week Ryan and I went on a 30 mile backpacking excursion into The Bull of The Woods Wilderness just east of Salem, OR. It was a loop hike, so we stashed the car and headed up the mountain. The first part of the hike was a 1000 foot elevation gain in 3 miles and I was a bit leary to start out with such a climb. Thankfully Ryan had just finished the final Harry Potter book and talked about it for 4 miles straight. It was a great way to start the journey. By the end of day 1 we had hiked about 6 miles and camped at the very secluded, twin lakes. For dinner we ate our own concoction of stovetop stuffing, dry gravy mix and pouch-chicken. It was delicious but it looked like gruel. We decided to call it "Trail Dumplings; aka Prison Chicken".

Day 2 was met bright and early with hot cocoa and oatmeal. The lake was glass and the air was earily still. After pumping 4 liters of water to fill our (water) bladders, we packed up and hit the trail again. The trail climbed steadily bringing us along a ridge that overlooked the middle of the wilderness. At about 5 miles we started a steep succession of switchbacks bringing us up another 800 to 900 feet. It was at this point when we drank the last of our water. Our destination was another lake so we weren't too woried. We tried to stop for lunch, but the meat bees were so numerous, it was just easier to eat on the move. Wheat thins, dried salami, and a string cheese.

At 9 miles I stopped to dig out an ingrown toenail, and Ryan spotted an old abandoned fire lookout on the summit of a nearby peak. With my boot back on, we ditched our packs and headed up the 2 mile spur trail hoping to get a glimpse from the lookout.

The views didn't disappoint. From way up here we could see a 360º panorama of the entire mountain range. Ryan desperately tried to get cell service to surprise his wife with a mid-hike phone call, but to no avail. From the lookout we could see our destination lake at the bottom of Big Slide mountain. It looked like a small puddle from where we stood 1100 feet above it. It would be another 3.1 miles from the lookout to the lake, ending our day at just about 12 miles.

With worn feet and rubbery legs, we dropped into the lake. The trail was so terribly maintained, we had to climb over fallen trees (many up to our chest) while descending. The trees were so long, we scaled the same one 4 times as the trail zig-zagged underneath it. Finally we were at the lake, and the only thing left to do was jump into its inviting, albeit mosquito and salamander infested waters.

That night we ate like kings: terriyaki rice with more pouch chicken, beef jerky, and dried mango. It was all gone in minutes.

Day 3 brought more oatmeal and cocoa. It also brought a mushroom which we tried to ignight with a sparker. It didn't work (Bear Grylls did it... he must have used a matchlight mushroom). Knowing the climb ahead of us, we powerd up by splitting an energy bar. An hour later we were 900 feet up and out of the lake, and the hard part of the day was over. So we thought.

What we didn't know was that the next 2 miles would drop us 1700 feet over more fallen trees, through thick brush, down massive rocky slides. After turning our knees into taffy, we found a sign at the bottom of the pass. It read: "Trail abandoned; no maintanence". Thanks.

It was time for a break, lunch, and maybe a nap. We sat on a mossy log and ate tuna wraps with a couple more power bars. Ryan watched an ant carry an impossible piece of wood, and I stared at the backs of my eyelids.

The loop we were on was meant to be done in 4 or 5 days, but we were aiming at 3. After lunch we crossed battle creek; a decent river in a rocky gorge. Like all rivers crossings, the trail was not immediately obvious on the other side, and we were caught in a narrow channel, with water on one side, and a wall on the other. Ryan opted to scale a 25 foot rock face to find the trail, and I opted to not. Near the top, he momentarily lost his footing and had to leap like tarzan into the air while grabbing a nearby tree branch. Then, with his belly against the rock wall, he could only do a massive pull-up (with a 20 lb pack on, mind you) to get to the top of the ridge. It was awesome. While that looked like fun and all, I wandered another 15 feet downstream to where the trail picked up.

More water was pumped, and we were onto our final leg. It was only supposed to be 3 or 4 miles, but it went on for ever and ever and ever. Fortunately, this part of the trail was flat and sparsely wooded. So the scenery was nice, but the sun was going down, and the trail was not ending. Somewhere beyond the forest our getaway vehicle sat waiting to take us to the nearest Carl's Jr. But it didn't show itself for about 3 hours. After coming all this way, our pace became so slow. We were hammered. The paint on the roof of my 11-year-old Accord is badly peeling; but it never looked so nice as we rounded the final steps to reveal it. We were through.

With three days of amazing scenery, clean air, delicious food, and plenty of good-ole' Marshall-boy-gabbin', this hike was everything it needed to be.